It seems, that in order to teach others I have to teach myself first. I have been working on myself everyday, for the last 10 months, and now I have reached a new frontier.
The inner frontier.
I'm an ( in essence) becoming a buddhist.
Now( not that I have to explain myself)
I still retain my Judeo-Christian beliefs because they are my moral compass. I say this because, I'm not a perfect human, or a perfect blogger. All I can be is real or weird but its me. It fit more into the idea of Erik that I have inside my mind. The idea of me.
I slowed down. I counted my breaths. From 1-10. Then start over, from 1. If I forget my place, because I start day dreaming, start counting at 1 again. I listened to my thoughts. I noticed that my breaths, are not as continuous or rhythmical as I thought. There are pauses.
Much like what we do, when we pray, it connects you to something deeper. A power that exist inside you, inside me, inside everything.
Connecting with this every day, has slowed my paranoia, and anxiety.
However, I have found something in buddhism, that I feel modern christianity missed( Not that Jesus missed, I use modern christianity to represent the American Modern Christian Church).
The focus on being happy and connected with everything in the universe.
Thank you Steve Jobs for pointing me in this direction.
One More Day. Another Day. Just breath.